i don't call it love :)

I reminded of a song lyric i had written 2 days after i left my school. I was inspired of my own story. I spent almost all my lovely 3 years in high school thinking of somebody. Who, i thought, loved me. I was so excited every time he sent me a message. I was so excited when he asked me to meet, even if he just wanted to talk about our school days. I was hypnotized, mesmerized.

I decided to tell him about my true feelings for him in our last day at school. At the school farewell. But, poor me, an hour before the farewell party was held, i knew about the truth. That the guy i dreamed of as my boyfriend had have a girlfriend, and the were official at 4 previous months. I was SO DESPERATE that time. I told all my girls about that, and they were sad for me.

I still wanted to tell that guy about my feelings. I was working on my phone, typing a long sms when the great thing that changed my life happened. There was a band, performed at that time. One of the member is a guy that had a crush on me the previous year. He was my best friend that time, and i felt so angry with his confession. We didn't talk to each other for about half and a year. Even if i looked at his eyes, he refused to see me. Well, this guy performed 2 songs with his band. And i always love the way he sing. And that time too, with no doubt. :)

The party was over. All of us were busy with hugs and cries and so many saddened things. I was just finished hugging my best girl friend when he was suddenly appear in front of me and laughing. I didn't realize what was happened, but I WAS CRYING LIKE HELL!!! I missed him so much. I was mumbling, cried on him, blamed him for everything that had happened in my life after he refused to talk to me. But he was only laugh and smiles. And told me how much he loved me and that it won't be changed. What could i say??? I just enjoyed his words. And kept it in my head and my heart as his promises.

He walked me back to the boarding house, but i asked him to go to our school lake and talk. :) He said, "what a flashback." and I laughed. Then, after we were talking, he finally told me a funny thing. "Our relationship will be a 20% friend, 20% lover, 20% enemy, 20% sibling and 20% not known." I laughed again, and agreed. He went home, and after I got on my room, I shouted for his name on the balcony, and saw him for (maybe) the last time.



I had forgotten about my hurt heart, those desperate feelings. All of them were just gone away. I was so excited having this guy back. :) We are still best friends. And i take full credit of that. I sent my sms to my former crush, and didn't feel sad at all. :D

Well, this the lyric i've made. :D

It's almost the end of our high school
there are so many things have changed
And we're attending farewell party
Then you sing a beautiful song

Party's over and you come to me
With a smile that i've been missing
You start to speak and i'm listen to
Yeah you say those words again

You say you love me, but i have known
You say you love me, my tears fall down
We both know we've started as best friend
But it's true love, baby, don't mind

I hold your hand for the last time
Cry out loud on your shoulder
And I tell you of how i hate you
But then we both just laugh

You say you love me, but i have known
You say you love me, my tears fall down
We both know we've started as best friend
But it's true love, baby, don't mind


I wanna spend what's left together
I wanna share my sadness and laughter
We both are friends that become lovers

You say you love me, but i have known
You say you love me, my tears fall down
We both know we've started as best friend
But it's true love, baby, don't mind